It is the Eleventh Hour. Time is running out. “Tick Tock,” goes the clock for TikTok. I am here not to defend nor condemn this wildly popular app. If what we are hearing and reading in the news, in a very short amount of time all of Americans who have the app on their devices will see the site go dark.
Maybe you are in the camp of, “Who cares? Good riddance to the time-sucking, data collecting, short-attention span enhancing, overstimulating, fake news spinning, spying, manipulating, seductively marketing, hypnotizing app…” Like the platform itself, that farewell could have gone on forever with the negative aspects.
And yet…TikTok was not all bad. Many would argue it connected people who otherwise would never share the same space, or be face to face (screen) LIVE. Many would also say TikTok was entertaining, made them laugh, taught a new skill, or took people to places they had never been like climbing a peak or backstage to a Broadway show through the performer’s lens. The possibilities for discovering something outside of your ordinary existence in your footprint of the world (or universe) were infinite. Until now. The shutdown just hours away.
Lest you assume I am ALL IN on this controversial social platform, I will share with you my personal experience. The good, bad, and the ugly.
Starting with the ugly and bad. It may be the mamabear in me, but I am a worrier. It’s difficult for me to watch movies or read books with violent crimes, high danger, or suffering victims. When I first got on TikTok I watched short clips of funny animals, talented dancers and singers, crafting and cooking—all harmless to the psyche. And then, like an ink droplet in a glass of water, my feed changed, in a dark cloudy way. I had no idea that the algorithm was evaluating my preoccupation as seconds ticked by while I watched what was on the screen.
Strangers arguing inside a store at a check out stand, at a gas station, on a beach, at a baseball game. Arguments escalating and people behaving badly. Even if I scrolled past it to kittens, the bickering Karens would resurface on my feed. I did not like how watching people in conflict made me feel…but I watched. I don’t want to take you through every dark rabbit hole I travelled. Let’s just say I have seen tons of videos of sharks, riptides, tsunamis, avalanches, bear encounters (scarier than my own two summers ago), all kinds of natural disasters. And even more disturbing, human travesties I dare not mention. All extremely distressing.
After one deep dive that turned my stomach with fear, I found it hard to simply set down my phone and not take my concerns to my family. I wanted them aware of the dangers out there. My millennial children laughed and asked, “Mom, what are you watching?” My son took one look at my TikTok feed and shook his head. “Let me show you how to retrain your algorithm.”
With his help, I hit the “disinterested “ button (or something like that), and then went to the videos that made me laugh or were positive and hit “like” or “follow” (or something like that). It worked. My feed returned to the more positive and uplifting, rarely sending me the bad stuff. It could always sneak back in—if I watched clips about floods, fires, and arguing politicians and citizens. It was all out there, a click or scroll away. The good, bad and the ugly.
Why engage with TikTok at all, you ask?
Two reasons.
First, as an aspiring author, working on my debut novel and other projects on the back burner, I have been told how important it is to build a social platform. This blog is where I do most of my creative writing (and if you like it please, please, please share it with others). My expansion into the other social platforms is trickling at a slower pace than it should. I’d truly rather be writing my book, essays for publication or blog posts than building a social presence. Many authors and readers (BookTok) use TikTok in promotion and networking. I like that we can join communities of others within our favorite genre or shared experiences in the writing journey. It is all about connecting.
My second reason for using TikTok is that I have had a blast creating short videos. Last count, I posted my 109th video clip to the TikTok site. Making movies was not actually new to me. Back when I began the Grizzlybearma blog, I often created short clips with music and graphics using iMovie. If you remember, they came out on Fridays and featured the two aussiedoodle puppies doing silly things and growing bigger. I enjoyed it. A few years later, we moved to the farm. I kept thinking there were video-worthy moments, but I was on a creative hiatus (barely even blogging).
In the spring of 2021 we brought home (picked up from the post office) a box of 16 chicks. Sixteen identical black sex link three day old chicks. I took videos at the hilarity of the ambitious endeavor, but I never posted for the world to see. Until the exciting miracle of egg laying ensued. “This must be shared with others,” I cried. Thus began my #farmlife of TikTok video sharing @grizzliebearma. (Don’t ask about the different spelling).
I was hooked from the start. Maybe it was that my second video I posted, showing five freshly laid eggs cracked and cooking in a skillet to Justin Beiber singing “Yummy yummy yummy” tipped the scales at 4,530 views. Four thousand five hundred thirty views! Eggs in a skillet. It may not sound like much compared to famous celebrities sharing favorite products at Christmastime or viral dances like “Applebee’s pie with the whip cream, on top” (or something like that). My next post tanked by comparison, at 109 views. It made me wonder, could the platform be luring me in with a high volume of viewers? In the four years since the popular egg post, no video of mine has exceeded 1,658 (a balloon popping clip with no farm animals in the scene). Most of my TikTok posts averaged 700, and as little as 87 (the lowly frog at night clip).
But what I discovered along the way is that the creating was the fun part. Sure, it felt good to get likes, follows and shares. But some of my favorite ones to make were my least viewed. It opened my eyes. It made me observe the trivial details about animals. Cats, dogs, goats, chickens, horses, and even the frogs, all do things a person might not notice unless they stop, sit and watch. And record with a camera (or paper and pen). I am lucky to get a front row view to this world, so why not share it with others? Add a little popular music and graphics, and you’ve got something someone out there might want to see.
So there it is, I like TikTok for the creative outlet and connecting with others.
Who knows exactly what will happen tomorrow for TikTok users? Will it go dark? Will some other platform replace it? It’s the end of something, both good and bad. I enjoyed it while it lasted, after I learned to keep out the dark stuff. It is a bittersweet good-bye. I will miss the entertaining rabbit holes but will look forward to getting the lost hours back into my day.
Fear not! The farm animals will keep doing what they do, I will keep recording them. And maybe, you’ll find us over on another site. Check my socials.
One final shameless plug: if you have enjoyed reading any of my Grizzlybearma posts, can you please share with others? (It’s possible after tomorrow they will have a little more time on their hands).
Thank you for your support! ❤️Carolyn (the og Grizzlybearma)
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