Month: June 2023

Do you get Cancel Pleasure?

On By Carolyn FreudenthalIn Deep Thoughts, farm life, Uncategorized1 Comment

(5 minute read)

I am usually one for “cancel pleasure.” Not today. Right now I should be up in the sky above Virginia en route to the west coast. Instead, I am sitting with my coffee and dogs at home on my sofa. Usually, I am one of those odd home bodies that like when plans fall through, and my day is reset with the gift of no agenda. I refer to it as “cancel pleasure.” I developed a taste for this antisocial “return-to-the-cave” feeling back when our children were young and we lived in Connecticut. Snow falling and accumulating on the ground brought forth the news, highly anticipated by all children in the north, announced through an automated phone call, “Due to inclement weather, school is cancelled.” Or in our house the kids shouted, “Snow day!”

I shared their joy in the cancellation of school and activities. Stay in pajamas. Make pancakes. Watch movies. Build a snowman or a snow fort. Play restaurant in the kitchen. Get out all the legos and blocks and turn a whole room into a city. More movies. More snowball fights. The best part was that our car stayed inside of the garage. No school also meant no after school activities to shuttle my kids around to. Cancel pleasure at its best! Unfortunately the euphoria wears off by day four, then cabin fever sets in. Come on, plow the roads! My house is a mess, the refrigerator and pantry shelves are becoming sparse. I love my kids and they love each other, but fights are starting to break out. And then, just when we get over the punchy hump and find our confinement rhythm, the schools open back up. A tiny part of me would oddly be sad that our break in the busy hustle of school and activities was over. Back to the daily grind.

Snow days still impact my life, though not as much. I no longer live in the Northeast so we do not get the snow or ice like we did. I also no longer have children in school. COVID was the closest thing to a snow day, confining us all at home. Even my college age kids were trapped here. At first we were scared of the dangerous virus, then we became upset with all of the cancelled celebrations. Then we hit our stride by taking a page out of our Connecticut snow days of the past. We watched movies. We played games. We made pancakes. We also cooked great meals and enjoyed cocktails together. We read books, played video games and basically made the best out of a tough situation. I cannot really say that I had cancel pleasure during our COVID social distancing, but I will admit that as a mother, it gave me a lot of quality time with my adult children and husband that I would not normally have gotten. Then the world reopened. I did not realize how much I missed seeing my friends.

These days the little bits of cancel pleasure I get are rained out tennis matches or rescheduled social plans. The strange thing is that I love playing tennis, and I love to get together socially with people. But for some reason, the little gifts of time that I get when something is taken off my schedule give me a tiny bit of satisfaction. I remember once when my son Jack was home from college and was supposed to go golfing with a buddy. His friend cancelled on him. I smiled and asked, “Aren’t you just a little relieved? You can chill out and relax today. No plans.” He did not agree with that sentiment at all. No such thing as cancel pleasure for that boy. He wants to always be doing.

I am sitting here wondering right now if there is any part of me that has cancel pleasure. I have spent weeks lining up the caregivers to watch over the herd (dogs, cats, chickens, goats, and horse). Months ago I made lodging and travel arrangements. I have written pages and pages of instructions for my sons and others who will be taking over what I do (It takes a village to run a farm). My bags are packed and sitting by the front door. Last night I said my goodbyes to the goats. I cradled little Ada in my arms, envisioning her growing in my absence. I snuggled our dogs on the sofa, worrying they will miss us badly. My sister reminded me that dogs live in the present and will not long for me, but will be happy to see me when I return.

Well, I am still here this morning, Koda. I greeted Ada in the barn. “I thought you said goodbye last night,” she bleated. I know, I thought I would be half-way to Denver by now. Our flights were cancelled. Not delayed, but cancelled. My husband, the experienced traveler, rebooked us on new flights in a couple days. So, even though I am ready and was excited to begin my vacation, plans change. We now have the “gift” of two more days here with the herd to prepare for our absence (but I am already prepared). There is nothing planned for the next two days. It appears that this may just be a gift of time, a little cancel pleasure? It sure beats the feeling of cancel disappointment. 

Lessons Learned from Dad

On By Carolyn FreudenthalIn Uncategorized1 Comment

9 minute read)

Some Lessons I Learned from Dad (in no particular order)

1. A good story is worth telling more than once. Even as a child I remember asking him to retell the same stories. “Tell the one about me standing in my crib with the big bandaid over my eye.” Or “How about the story of taking the grandkids to pizza after a soccer morning and Jack being so tired he was laying down in the booth and all of a sudden a hand just came up to the table and grabbed a slice of pizza and brought it down under the table.” Again and again, we toss these stories around. Because a good story is worth telling more than once.

2. If an accident happens or a mistake is made, just improvise. Go with it, as I did in the play “Hands Across the Sea” in fourth grade drama class. I had very few lines, but I was the bartender in the scene. I was supposed to be shaking a shaker for a martini and I spilled it all. Instead of panicking, I played it off well with some improvised comments with a British accent. All I truly remember from that experience is how much Dad talked about my great improvisation after the stage prop mishap.

3. Dad’s advice to each of my four children upon college graduation is a story about his first job. His employer said, “I assume you know nothing, but I also assume you have the ability to learn.” These words of wisdom helped ease the pressure off their fresh-out-of-college shoulders, and also reminded them how much their grandfather believed in them and what they could do in life.

4. Make as many family memories as you are able, the kids will grow fast and you will have those memories to hold onto forever. This lesson is not one Dad said, it is one of those that he and Mom modeled for us as parents. Growing up, we were lucky enough to be able to take many family vacations. Santa Cruz and Lake Tahoe, but also faraway destinations like Washington DC, Sun Valley, Idaho, Hawaii, Canada, Cayman Islands, and Mexico. Parents make decisions on how to spend their money (or save), and mine placed a high value on families packing up and getting out of town together. Our Minnie Winnie RV trip to Wyoming, Nevada, Utah and Colorado was one of my most memorable. Picture four teenage girls getting silly in an RV, listening to the soundtrack of America, as Mom and Dad used paper maps to navigate to the next KOA campground. 

5. Do the “Gimme’s” first. This is a tip for solving crossword puzzle clues that came straight out of Dad’s Crossword Solver book he wrote. He advises looking for the easiest, most commonly found, clues to solve first. Then the letters can help to solve the more difficult clues. Not only does this help begin progress on a complex word puzzle, but it is also a tactic I apply to seemingly insurmountable tasks. How will I ever get this whole barn cleaned up? Ok, just start with the easy things: open the stall doors for air, then muck the manure… I find myself offering this same advice to my children when they are stressed about some big something. I suggest they just knock off the easy tasks first.

6. Showing support for your children’s and grandchildren’s interests strengthens the connections. Dad never made me feel like he missed out having only daughters and no sons. He was my biggest fan at soccer, swim team and gymnastics. He loves to tell the story about driving me to gymnastics in our family van, as I bounced around the car with boundless energy (before seatbelts). Dad follows all the grandkids’ activities, asking about and attending when possible, football and baseball games, volleyball matches, and musical performances. His genuine interest provided connection across the miles that separate us.

7. Reading is knowledge. Read a lot. Dad is always reading a book and more recently, listening to books on tape. I am convinced that this is why he is so good at Trivial Pursuit and solving crossword puzzles. He is so smart. Reading so much is a big part of this. He also has this uncanny knack for recalling details. Many people rely on Siri or Alexa to answer perplexing questions. Not Dad, he will sit there thinking, and in time, supply the answer (or possibly ask Mom, who is also an avid reader).

8. Observe the hatch before you choose the fly. So this lesson is one I learned from fly fishing with him in Montana and at the Trinity River house. He may not have verbalized it but to watch him eye the river before he put his chosen fly on the line, I observed the way he watched the water, bugs in flight above it, and the plant life on the riverbed. Just as Dad took in various bits of information before helping me to solve a problem, he did the same with fishing. I remember calling him in tears from a phone booth when my car broke down on the Alta Mont Pass. He calmly asked all the questions, “Where is your car parked? Are you near a gas station? Calm down.” Years later I found myself asking similar questions to my son who boarded the wrong train. “Ok, how much battery life is left in your cellphone? How much cash do you have in your wallet? Can you tell where your train is headed? It’s ok, calm down.”

9. A good pan makes the perfect omelette. Dad is a great cook. Growing up he was the BBQ chef of my favorite spare ribs, but he has turned into quite the chef in later years. I love seeing the teamwork of my parents in the kitchen. 

10.  Laughing hard is a good release. Making people laugh can feel just as good. Dad is funny. He makes his friends laugh with clever stories. I love when he laughs so hard his eyes tear. In our house, we watched all kinds of entertainment that made us laugh. SNL, Cheers, Seinfeld to name a few on tv. Then there were movies like The Jerk or What About Bob?. There are countless more, too many for me to name. As my children know me to say, “My measure of a good time was if you laughed a lot.” I think I got that from Dad.

11. Life can deal you some tough stuff. Get back up, pull up your boot straps. Not much to say more about this, but Dad encourages resilience in all of us.

12. Musical talent is a gift. I wish I had it, and since I don’t then surround myself with those that do. And maybe take some lessons. Dad is a talented musician, by studying, practicing, but mostly by his God-given talent. He can pick up an instrument, almost any, and play something by ear. The lesson I have learned from being his daughter is that if I love music then I need to have instruments around me, have musicians (my kids) around me, and find the courage to take some lessons again. 

13. Dad loves my mom more than anything. Marriage is not always easy, especially when you throw raising four children into the mix. I look at Mom and Dad, who have celebrated over 60 years together, and I am inspired. I learn from watching them, they do the work it takes, the little things. She gets him the newspaper in the morning and brings it to him with coffee. He records the Warriors and waits to sit with her and watch together. They read poetry to each other! 

14. Practice your groundstrokes. When Dad visited me over the last ten years that I rekindled my tennis game (from my childhood days of tennis), he would come sit court side and watch me play. On one visit I was complaining about losing, and he offered the advice “practice your groundstrokes.” I can apply that to other areas such as writing.  Dad wrote a book, which was a big accomplishment, but harder than anticipated. He encourages me to keep on writing.

15. The last thing I can think of that I learned from Dad is that a parent observes far more than a daughter realizes. As the middle child of four girls, I was always seeking attention. “Look at me! Watch me! Did you see that?” It may possibly be what drives me to BLOG or write details of my life for others to read, even if at the same time I am exposing my flaws. Mom constantly provided verbal recognition. With Dad, he was busy working hard and I was not always sure he was noticing me or my three sisters. I was wrong. Only now, in my adult years, as a parent, do I realize how much Dad does follow our lives. I understand him now, “It may not appear that you have my attention all of the time, but I see you and I am proud of you.”

There are many other lessons from Dad, these are just the 15 I came up with yesterday in writing this BLOG, as I watched my husband teach his son the best method of planting his oak sapling from Elon. Dig a deep hole, add enriched soil. Pack firmly. Add water. There you go! A mighty oak tree has been planted! Lessons from Dads are not forgotten. Thank you to all the Dads for the life lessons. Happy Father’s Day!

Happy Father’s Day Dad!

You Got this!

On By Carolyn FreudenthalIn UncategorizedLeave a comment

When was the last time you gave something everything you had? With nothing left in your reserve of energy? It has been a long time since I have been at that point but I remember the feeling clearly. The extreme exertion calling on every part of my body and mind. No training or preparation rehearses the pinnacle moment when you have used everything left in the tank, just enough to get you across the finish line. 

This past Sunday we cheered my son Jack on in his first half-ironman. It is 70.3 miles to be exact. For the past six months he has been swimming, biking and running. His work days were preceded by 5:00 am lap swimming at the Y. Many evenings and weekends he was hitting the pavement on foot or on wheels. A lot of his training hours were squeezed in between busy work trips. He is no stranger to discipline and physical fitness, as a former college football player. Perhaps what was foreign about all of this triathlon training was the emphasis on endurance. The essential component of endurance event training is time. Workout duration and frequency lengthens as the event nears, and only tapers right before the race. It is a long haul and requires a commitment to go the distance (literally).

If I sound familiar with this, it is because I am! I can proudly say that eighteen years ago I did an olympic distance triathlon. There is no other way to put it other than, “It was the hardest thing I have ever done.” Even though I spent over five months training with triathlon coaches and teammates in a “fail-proof” program called Team in Training, it still was incredibly difficult. The swimming was my favorite. I loved being in the water, as it brought me back to all of my days on swim team as a kid. I was a natural and felt relaxed turning my strokes into more of an endurance form of freestyle. Sure I had to learn some new things like sight breathing for open water swims and conserving energy with softer kicking. But compared to biking and running, swimming was a breeze. Biking was tricky with the mechanics of gear shifting and the safety on the road. Running was awful in the beginning, and just became a little less so as my body conditioning improved. On my race day (roughly 35 miles), I was excited, prepared and ready to go. The swim went well, as did the bike. The 6 miles at the end of the triathlon almost did me in. It was the two loop course that messed with my mind. I remember being so tired and sore as I passed by the crowd at the finish line, heading out for my second loop. I gave every ounce I had to finish the race. This moment of triumph flooded me with emotion. I cried and was unable to get words out as my family rushed up to me to congratulate me. I do not need to look at a photograph to remember, I can picture it all and feel what I felt. The moment is one of raw surrender and relief. “I did it,” and “That was so freakin hard.” 

On Sunday, I watched my 26 year old son push himself further than he had expected. The gravity of the moment clearly expressed on his face and in his voice. I know that feeling. There are not many fitness related things that my son and I can share firsthand knowledge of. Other than strategy on a tennis court where we have played singles (splitting wins), or ping pong in the basement, our sports do not overlap. This made it extra special for me to see him train in these new areas. He recorded one of his swims on his iPhone and sent it to us for tips on strokes. He and his dad (a multiple-Ironman finisher) exchanged workout schedules and trained together on several occasions. It is pretty amazing to share something like this with your son or daughter (or husband). A little over ten years ago, my husband completed his first Ironman triathlon (140.6 miles). We were all there to support him as he crossed the finish line in the dark of the night with eyes gleaming with tears. 

I am in awe of all of the triathlon athletes and their supporters. Each one of the events that I have attended, including the one I participated in in Austin, Texas, have blown me away in positive energy. Imagine crowds lined up along the streets cheering words of support, “You got this! You can do it! Almost there!” It is hard to explain. As the athlete running through those cheering crowds and volunteers handing you waters, you feel carried further than during the silent moments at the end of the run course turn-around. As one of the cheering folks at the barricades, there is this feeling of unity, that we are all on the same team. So much positivity. So many friends and family there to support the athletes. Music. Families with strollers. Dogs on leashes. Food trucks. Signs. Cow bells. It is inspiring to watch runners of different ages, ethnicities, and sizes cross the finish line. A man turning 73 was announced as he finished his 70.3. In the middle of the park, past the finish line, there were dozens of worn out, energy depleted, triathletes with Eagleman 70.3 finishers medals around their necks. For some, it was one of many endurance events, for others it was the first ever. The joy of completion was felt by all.

Here is also how I know how much positivity was palpable in Cambridge, Maryland, on Sunday: after the race ended we had to climb aboard yellow school buses to shuttle back to our cars in a distant parking lot. Not one person complained. Even as the racers had to bring their bikes and gear into the tight quarters of a hot cramped elementary school bus not intended for bike transport, these athletes and their supporters were still all smiles. I remember crankier rude people at Disneyworld on the monorail. This surprised me and inspired me. How can we take this positive energy, bottle it up and sprinkle it other places? Like grocery store check out lines and crowded understaffed restaurants. Perhaps the checkers and waiters just need a little smile and a “You got this!”

I am told that a similar crowd “positivity” phenomenon occurs at the Taylor Swift Eras concerts. Apparently, all the Swiftee fans share so much love for her music that they can put differences aside for an afternoon and evening, trade bracelets, dance in the stands in unison, and connect in ways many fans do not get lucky enough to. Rather than shelling out hundreds or thousands of dollars for a Taylor Swift ticket, if I want to be surrounded by positive energy I need look no further than the nearest triathlon event on a given weekend. I can show up to volunteer like my other son did (assisting swimmers out of the swim) or simply bring a cow bell and my voice to cheer on the athletes.

“You Got This!” 

“Keep it Going!”

“Shake it off!”

Congratulations Jack! To see what race day looks like see his TikTok at https://www.tiktok.com/t/ZT8JJ3emk/ If that link doesn’t work check out jackswerve on Tiktok.

Puzzle Answers & A Big Announcement

On By Carolyn FreudenthalIn UncategorizedLeave a comment

As promised, here are the answers to the family matching puzzle a few days ago:

But “DON’T TOUCH THAT DIAL,” as they used to say before commercials. After reading through the correct answers you will find an important announcement about a family that was left out of the whole blog post on families. 

  1. This family ruled a kingdom from an iron throne. (The Lanisters of Game of Thrones)
  2. Pa and Ma raised their three daughters on the prairie. (the Ingalls of Little House on the Prairie)
  3. Eight kids under one roof was busy for one dad and his new wife. (The Bradfords of Eight is Enough)
  4. This family has a dog names Astro. (The Jetsons of The Jetsons)
  5. Five siblings find their way through life after the loss of both parents. (The Salingers of Party of Five)
  6. A blended family merging three sons with three daughters. (The Bradys of The Brady Bunch)
  7. Two uncles live in this full house with their brother and three nieces. (The Tanners of Full House)
  8. They’re creepy and they’re kooky. (The Addams of The Addams Family)
  9. Before lights out, each family member calls out goodnight to one another. (The Waltons of The Waltons)
  10. The big cliffhanger of this show was who shot JR. (The Ewings of Dallas)
  11. One of this liberal couple’s children turned out to be a staunch republican. (The Keatons of Family Ties)
  12. Embarking on a mission to explore the universe, this family found themselves lost. (The Robinsons of Lost in Space)
  13. A town by their same name was purchased as a joke for their son. (The Schitts of Schitts Creek)
  14. This Italian mafia family entertained us for six seasons. (The Sopranos of The Sopranos)
  15. Richie and Joanie were the do-good children of this happy family. (The Cunninghams of Happy Days)
  16. The 1980s primetime soap opera was rebooted in 2017. (The Carringtons of Dynasty)
  17. Striking it rich, these country folk discovered oil. (The Clampetts of The Beverly Hillbillies)
  18. Conniving, power hungry kids compete for taking over their father’s company. (The Roys of Succession)
  19. This picture perfect family of the 1950s was full of wholesome tales, even with a friend like Eddie Haskel stopping by. (The Cleavers of Leave It To Beaver)
  20. A family that will protect its land at any cost, going back several generations. (The Duttons of Yellowstone).

One tv family that I left off of the list above is the Shelby family. The Shelbys are from the show Peaky Blinders. We were drawn to this show over the last year even though it came out in 2013. It’s one of those shows on Netflix that I’d heard about and dismissed as something not at the top of my watch list perhaps because of the violence and the strong accents that made it difficult to understand. Hearing how much buzz there was around the show, I finally gave it a shot (with the help of subtitles). It is set in the 1920s in Birmingham, England. The main storyline follows the criminal activity of the powerful gang called the Peaky Blinders. Illegal bookmaking, fixing races and bootlegging were just some of what took place. Why would I be drawn to such a series? The Shelby family. There is something about the loyalty of the Shelby siblings that live in a world so different than my own. The grit, the grime, and the gang full of characters tough enough to survive in a rough place and time in history. I found myself rooting for this criminal family of four brothers (Thomas, Arthur, John, and Finn), one sister (Ada), and their aunt (Polly). If these names sound familiar it is because we chose to name our goats after the Shelby family. We also have Lizzie (who was formerly a prostitute but ended up marrying Thomas Shelby). Great show with catchy names that seemed perfect for our gang of goats.

If you had not noticed, I named seven goats. This is our BIG ANNOUNCEMENT! Last week we returned to the beautiful goat farm in the hills of Virginia and retrieved the remaining Shelbys (Arthur, John and Finn). We had seen them on our first visit, and they were not ready to leave the farm. We got home and our herd felt incomplete. We called up the goat farmer and the boys were still available. A month later, they are here now: one big happy family. The Shelby goat herd needs it’s own blog post so I will save it for another day. I could not wrap up the tv family blog post without mentioning Peaky Blinders and the Shelbys.

Our Obsession With Succession (and other family shows) *Plus a little trivia game

On By Carolyn FreudenthalIn UncategorizedLeave a comment

(8 minute read PLUS a bonus matching game that may take longer)

Last week we watched the finale of Succession. Five years ago the first episode of this dark comedy, family drama series created by Jesse Armstrong aired on television’s HBO. My family was obsessed with Succession. We had lengthy discussions of the fictional Roy family, analyzing their flawed characters and what transpired in each episode over the past four seasons. We humorously drew comparisons to our own family of four children (three sons and one daughter); the siblings’ genders being about the only things our families have in common. Competition, power, and ego drove the Roy children as they vied for who would lead the successful business empire once their authoritative affection-lacking father stepped down. With no intentions of spoiling the story or outcome of this sharp-tongued peek into the boardrooms and fancy New York penthouse apartments, I merely wish to ponder upon what the draw is for us. Why do we choose to tune in to watch a family saga unfold with conflict and emotion? What is it about following the relationships between parents and children or between siblings? Especially with characters such as the Roys who are so selfish? Whether the family we watch is full of unkind or kind relatives, we as tv viewers are entertained by looking into the window of another family’s household. Other family dynamics capture our attention even though we can look across the room at the pictures on our own mantel to be reminded of a more personal family story.

This question made me pause and reflect upon the other tv shows about families I have tuned in to watch on the sofa’s edge as an adult or as a child on the shaggy rug on my stomach with my chin resting on the cradle of my open palms.  Before I dive into this topic, I say we have a little fun with some tv family trivia. 

Match the family name with the clue: (answer to follow in a few days)

  1. This family ruled a kingdom from an iron throne.
  2. Pa and Ma raised their three daughters on the prairie.
  3. Eight kids under one roof was busy for one dad and his new wife.
  4. This family has a dog names Astro.
  5. Five siblings find their way through life after the loss of both parents.
  6. A blended family merging three sons with three daughters.
  7. Two uncles live in this full house with their brother and three nieces.
  8. They’re creepy and they’re kooky.
  9. Before lights out, each family member calls out goodnight to one another.
  10. The big cliffhanger of this show was who shot JR.
  11. One of this liberal couple’s children turned out to be a staunch republican.
  12. Embarking on a mission to explore the universe, this family found themselves lost.
  13. A town by their same name was purchased as a joke for their son.
  14. This Italian mafia family entertained us for six seasons.
  15. Richie and Joanie were the do-good children of this happy family.
  16. The 1980s primetime soap opera was rebooted in 2017.
  17. Striking it rich, these country folk discovered oil.
  18. Conniving, power hungry kids compete for taking over their father’s company.
  19. This picture perfect family of the 1950s was full of wholesome tales, even with a friend like Eddie Haskel stopping by.
  20. A family that will protect its land at any cost, going back several generations.
  1. the Bradys
  2. the Waltons
  3. the Keatons 
  4. the Bradfords
  5. the Ingalls
  6. the Tanners
  7. the Salingers
  8. the Ewings
  9. the Carringtons
  10. the Addams
  11. the Robinsons
  12. the Clampetts
  13. the Schitts
  14. the Sopranos
  15. the Jetsons
  16. the Cleavers
  17. the Lanisters 
  18. the Cunninghams
  19. the Duttons 
  20. the Roys

The list above just scratches the surface of fictional families. I was drawing from my own viewing experience (as a child, an adult, and as a mom of children watching tv shows). As I put this list together I realized that my taste for family drama was mostly driven by how very different their situations were than my own nuclear family. My upbringing was fairly normal with two happily married parents and their four daughters. Not having any brothers did occupy some of my curiosity, so shows like The Brady Bunch and Eight is Enough were novel to me. I also liked to imagine myself in a family setting far different than my own, set in a different time period or socioeconomic level. Horrible as the thought of it is, I was drawn to the family shows where children were surviving without living parents. Watching television, going to movies, and reading books is our way of putting ourselves in others’ shoes. Sometimes it is very uncomfortable and makes us appreciate the family we have. I remember the lens in which I viewed life in other families growing up. I also remember it changing as a mother. 

Some of the shows listed above had families with absentee mothers, or too perfect to be real mothers. Just as I did as a child curious about life as a daughter in another family, I find myself questioning the mothering going on in these fictional families. Several years ago, we were watching a tv show where the mother kissed her children goodnight and turned off the light and left their room. My son was distraught, “How come that mommy just left the room? Why didn’t she lay down next to the little boy and read him books, rub his back and sing him a song?” I smiled at his assumption of bedtime rituals taking place in all families.

The mother in the show Succession was far from a mama bear. She provided no affection or words of comfort, and her children grew up to be tough sharp-edged adults. This bothered me, but piqued my curiosity. Whether I am watching Carmella Soprano or June Cleaver, I am subconsciously measuring up. Carmella always had a full refrigerator of great leftover pasta or cold cuts. June listened to Beaver, giving him undivided attention and encouraging loving words. Both mothers performed their motherly tasks in high heels (not ever going to happen for me). I especially loved a story arc where the family grew closer together; Moira Rose in Schitts Creek turned out to be more of a mother than she appeared to be in episode one, as well of the rest of her spoiled family. We root for the flawed folks, we hope that time and events will change them in their ways. Not every family show gives us this satisfied happy ending. Yet still, we set our recorders, tune in, or stream to catch where the action takes our beloved family. Series end, their finales leaving us with some tied up resolutions but many unanswered questions of what befalls each member of the family. 

Two of my all time favorite family show finales are Parenthood and Six Feet Under. The Bravermans end their six seasons on NBC with a family game of baseball. I get chills remembering them heading out to the neighborhood diamond without Granddad (Craig T. Nelson). It made me smile and cry, and left me grateful and hopeful. Interestingly enough, Peter Krouse acted in both of these shows that I reference, but two very different families and shows. The finale of Six Feet Under took my breath away. In a 5 minute montage set to music, each one of the members of the Fisher family (who ran a funeral home), are shown aging and completing their life sped up, wrapping up their character arcs. For a show that dealt with life and death, it was beautiful and moving, artistically portraying the inevitable. The writers of that show gave us something we do not usually get with with our family tv shows. Did Alex Keaton ever run for President? Did Jan Brady ever get the attention she always craved? What kind of mother did Shiv Roy turn out to be? Do the Duttons lose their ranch? How fractured does their family end up in the end? We will be watching the final season to find out, but Taylor Sheridan may just leave us hanging when the credits roll.

My favorite family show is this one. Plenty of action and drama.