Pep, pizazz, pluck, and punch. Jumping down from the steps, chasing each other, smelling everything, exploring with their mouths. Spying what the other pup is doing and then racing over to pounce. These puppies have two speeds: napping and playing. It’s bursts of liveliness and activity as they exert all that energy.

This is a different type of energy which I am writing about today. After my session with the dog handler, whom I will call “G,” I learned that behavior training is all about energy. Not the wild-spirit energy that seems to be replenished with every nap they take. I am talking about the energy in our space. It may be the Northern-California-raised-girl in me that likes this vibe-like dog behavior philosophy. Humans have many different energies. G (the dog handler) definitely came in with an energy that felt right. I felt relaxed, and that we were in good hands. Which, by the way, is exactly what our puppies need to feel.

They look to us, the humans in the house, for calm and balance. I cannot help but think back to when our aussie, Dot, came home to the chaos of a family with four young children. I remember a trainer telling me that Dot needed a calm predictable environment, and I told her flat out that it was too late, our house was anything but. Somehow we figured it out. Dot thrived in the herding work I gave her, but she also exhibited anxiousness when she sensed my stress or elevated concerns. So if I started to freak out inside about her reaction to a visitor to our house, Dot sensed it and became protective. It was mostly just me who caused this unsettled feeling in her. My energy.

I’d like to think I am a calmer woman than I was fourteen years ago. My children are older and independent. There are not kids rough-housing on the furniture, or scaling the pantry shelves for snacks before dinner. I am not yelling, “Shoes on! Shoes on!” In a mad effort to get my crew organized and out the door for school. Things are fairly quiet around the house these days. I am also different.

I tend to be more relaxed and chill. Reading, writing, crosswords, sitting and observing are things I enjoy now more than ever. Kitty is my partner in serenity. I am happy to report that she continues to be the calm force, sleeping on the sofa just a few feet away from the puppies. My biggest challenge is making sure that my outward peaceful nature is also what I am feeling on the inside. The GrizzlyBearMa name started for a reason. My brain can be consumed with worry and problem-solving over my cubs. The protective instinct around their well-being is fierce. Seems simple enough, just keep my energy balanced. Breathe.

As G explained, I need to work at it, fake it if I have to, but really try to exude calmness and confidence. There is one hurdle that I must get over to achieve this. I am afraid of dogs. Not all dogs, just every dog I don’t know that looks wise to my fear and has teeth. That’s a lot of dogs out there. Like horses (who I’m also nervous around), they have keen awareness of a fear. I’ll write another day about where this originated, for now I realize it’s necessary for me to get over it. As G the dog handler said, this is not only canine behavior training, it’s human behavior training.

My energy is all about love, kindness, providing security for my cubs, and I will do my best to overcome the negative energy that throws our space off balance. Koda and Summer, you are in good hands. I got this. Deep breath as I practice the “settle hold” with each of them. Ahhh.

It’s a big day for me! Today we are getting a visit from an experienced dog handler. She came highly recommended from a friend. Our phone conversation last week revealed right away that she would be a good fit for us. Her positive approach to communicating with dogs came through the phone clearly. I look forward to having her over in person for our first meeting. I will try not to bombard her with too many of the questions circling through my tired brain.

Is their playing too rough? The rolling around all over each other with mouthes open?
Is there a way to stop some behaviors that could become problems: like digging in the garden, gnawing on the legs of the table, trying to hop up onto the sofa, grabbing a shoe quietly and taking it to a corner to nibble on, Koda humping Summer, or shredding a magazine?
How often do we need to separate the pups? Meals? Playing? Training?
Is there a special way to get them to come back to me when they run off to the perimeter of the yard behind all the tall bushes where I can’t see them? Yelling “I have a treat for you,” is losing its power.
And what about the collar and leashes? The times we have tried to get them comfortable with them it looks like a rodeo ring, with a wild bronco twisting and turning away from the restraints. Summer tried to eat the leash. Koda just laid flat on his stomach. So I guess I will need some help with the collar and leash thing!

I will proudly say, they sit on command (for treats), and they go to the back door when needing to potty. That’s progress for less than two weeks in our home! But there is so much more we and they need to learn. Help me, Dog Handler!

 

YOU ARE INVITED…

to a DOG PARTY!

Big dogs, little dogs.
Red dogs, blue dogs.

Dogs in the hood: Wilson, Otto, Rosie, Bodhi, Bizzy, Hazel, Cooper, Sanibel, Tampa, Muffin, Shiner, Piglet, Winston, Lucky, Lillie, Mu Shu

Dogs across the country: Scout, Spencer, Shiloh, Cookie, Gizmo, Paulo, Oliver

Dogs in doggie heaven: Dot, Janet, Paula, Darcie, Lucy, OJ, Carlo, Tinkerbell, Carlo, Rosco. Bowser, Rusty, Trudi, Cork, Lady, Lucky, Baby, Sumo, Pansie, Cricket, Bailey, Tiki, Mimi, Raider, HeyBoy, Alice, Poppy, Queenie, Tikka

Any dog we forgot to include: YOU are invited to a DOG PARTY!

First we need to get all our shots…and then maybe we start with some individual playdates. But just imagine how fun it would be to all be at the same DOG PARTY at once! (Kitty might feel a little left out though)

Go, Dog. Go! Is a favorite in our household, it’s a 1961 book written and illustrated by P.D. Eastman.

*I am new to this whole online posting thing and still figuring out copywriting rules so I am not inserting my favorite page of that book. PLEASE LOOK THIS PAGE UP! The dog party is awesome! Google “Dog Party by P.D Eastman” and look at the images.  That is what I envision when I watch Koda and Summer out in our backyard. A dog party!

“Paula! Janet!”
I’ve called the puppies by the wrong names several times in the past week. Mixing up my children’s names is something I have been known to do on occasion. But these two names are not my daughter’s name or any of my three sisters’ names (who by the way I accidentally call my daughter sometimes). Janet and Paula are from a previous life of mine. Well, not actually. They are from our years as D.I.N.K.s. The carefree time in our marriage we refer to as the “Dual Income No Kids.”

Just married, making money, and having fun spending that money! Our first big purchase was a stereo console the size of a small refrigerator. We ate on a card table and plastic patio chairs, but our condo was booming with music from MC Hammer and Madonna. Both of us were pet lovers, so it did not take long before we became DINKs with a dog.

My husband surprised me on my birthday with bringing home a beautiful blonde cocker spaniel, just like the one from Lady and the Tramp. Instead of a Lady, it was a “lad” who was a rescue dog. He’d had a rough beginning that made him nervous from the start. We named him O.J. after a little private joke we had about the words olive juice. O.J. became the most fitting name for this dog that had a mean side. He could be sweet and happy if left unbothered. My in-laws took a real liking to O.J. and ultimately took him home to their house. They had a large yard and knew how to deal with his temperament. They loved O.J. for many years and he loved them.

We waited awhile before the time was right to try again for expanding our pet family. We had saved and bought our first house, with a tiny backyard. It felt natural to get a puppy. Now I will admit something that may surprise you, we got TWO PUPPIES. My blog my have led you to believe that I had never had two puppies at once before. I have. But it was so long ago there are many things I do not remember.

We adopted two purebred Shih Tzu females from a breeder. We visited the litter and picked our our little sweethearts, brought them home and named them. The smaller light brown one we called “Paula” after Paula Abdul. The plumper darker-coated one we named “Janet” after Janet Jackson. It was the eighties! Our two little girls were precious! Tiny! Hours after we brought them home we discovered a large bump on Janet’s stomach. We called the breeder who told us we could exchange her for a different pup. My husband wanted to do that. I shrieked, “What?! Just take her back and switch her out?! No way. This is Janet and she knows us already.” So after a little hernia repair our Janet stayed with our family. She did end up being the kookiest of the two dogs.

Paula and Janet were not your typical Shih Tzu’s. I like to remember them as cool California outdoor no-fuss Shih Tzu’s. We kept them groomed in short puppy cuts with only fluff on their heads. They played outdoors in the California climate. Chasing balls, running circles around furniture, and burning a lot of energy. I will never forget their large expressive round eyes, their bottom teeth, and the hair on the top of their heads pulled into a bow. Cute and outdoorsy at the same time!

Koda and Summer are young puppies but are the same size as Janet and Paula full grown. So you can understand my occasional mistake at calling them by the wrong name. It makes me smile when I do it, remembering those days almost three decades ago.

I love solving crossword puzzles. My favorite time of the week is Sunday night when the Monday puzzle is released. I subscribe to the New York Times crossword puzzle app on my iPad. Will Shortz is the editor. It was very hard for me in the beginning, but I soon loved the feeling of figuring out answers bit by bit. Then to complete the entire puzzle felt like an accomplishment. If you are wondering what drew me to this interest (and maybe you are not), I will first tell you that I have been around the most avid crossword puzzle solver for all of my life. My dad. He did not begin solving on a regular basis until my teen years.

Not only does he begin his day with the folded paper and pen in his hands, he has also written a book about this “passion” of his. I would not refer to it as an addiction, but close to it. There have been some days when he visited that we had to drive to several different stores in search of that newspaper that somehow is in low supply and high demand here in Virginia. My dad is smart as a whip. He uses no dictionary, no online googling, and barely even asks the people in the room for help. In the book he wrote several years ago, he gave a background for how his interest in crossword puzzle solving began. Then he went on to give advice about how to tackle the puzzles.

Now I must admit that initially I only read through his book for his narrative about his developing passion and his references to our family. The crossword puzzle solving did not interest me, and in fact, kind of frustrated me. He had a tip about solving the “gimme’s” and then gave some example clues. These are supposed to be the super easy ones. Well forget it, Dad. His idea of a “gimme” and mine were two different things. These days I know exactly what he meant by that. I believe I was not in the mindset to think like that when his book came out. Just a different stage in my life.

For over a year now, I have eagerly solved two to three puzzles a week. My favorite is the easiest one which is Monday. I also like the themed puzzles of Wednesday or Sunday. I do not use paper, pen or pencil. I like the iPad and sometimes we airplay it up to the tv for several of us to collaborate. I kind of got my daughter hooked too. When the puzzle is solved completely and correctly, a little jazzy tune plays and the time it took is revealed. I admit I get a little bit of a rush when hearing that tune!

What does any of this have to do with puppies? Crossword puzzle solving takes concentration. Puppies need attention. As I said before, when they nap, I read, write, or get things done around the house. When they are awake, I am focused on them, keeping them on a schedule and watching for important signals from them… Last night, I got distracted. Can you blame me? The Monday puzzle was revealed, I attacked it successfully in under thirty minutes. The puppies played at my feet with chew toys and pouncing around. Then it grew quiet. Too quiet. I jumped up to take them out, but was a little too late for something I found on the hardwood floor by the door.

Clue: stinky canine palindrome (four letters)

The family doctor has always played an important role in my years of motherhood. Whether it was my ob-gyn, the pediatrician or the veterinarian, I needed to feel comfortable, not judged, and able to ask anything. Some people live in the same community for years and have the same doctors. That was my life growing up in California. Dr. Cook was my doctor from preschool years until my long legs sprawled over the edge of the crinkly-papered examining table. He took care of my ear infections from swim-team, my bout with chicken pox, my fevers, aches and pains. My memories of our visits are from the waiting room where I would lean my head into the soft space under my mothers arm at her side, as she read to me the Goofus and Gallant section of the worn Highlights magazine.

What I know all these years later is that Dr. Cook was not just there to take care of me. He was there for my mother. She needed him as she raised four girls. He gave her more than prescriptions, he gave sage advice. When parenthood brings up frustration and questions, a trusted caring professional is what is needed most. With no internet to search back in those days my mother relied on her instincts, advice from friends and family and possibly the Dr. Spock book. But when you have the questions that you’d prefer not to be talked about around the neighborhood, like “How can I get my six year old daughter to stop throwing tantrums when her older sister teases her?” It is a trusted professional like Dr. Cook that you need. His advice was to take this third daughter on walks alone, to give her some undivided attention. It worked.

As the mother of four kids, I understand what my mother needed in her doctors. We moved several times over the years which meant finding new doctors each time. Some were better than others. Walking into the small room with four kids in tow I could see right away if this was going to be a good fit. Those group visits were rare, as I tried to take each alone (or with the baby in the carrier).

It is not any different with our animals. In fact if anything, I always needed to have the vet see who our Aussie was herding. My kids loved going with me. In one town, the vet saw interesting animals like birds and ferrets. Often a waiting room would have a crate of kittens needing new homes, my kids were entertained during our wait. Then when it was our turn, we’d all shuffle into the small room and Dot got examined on the metal table, while the kids looked on.

My favorite all time veterinarian has to be the one we have now, who I will refer to Dr.D. He is gentle, kind, and takes the time to listen to all my questions. We have been coming to him for the past nine years, since moving to Virginia. He helped Kitty get over some tough adjustment and psychological stress (possibly from the fourth relocation in her life). He helped me at the same time with my guilt I carried about having a stressful environment for Kitty. We got through it. At the same time, Dot became extremely nervous around the vet clinic, and Dr.D and I devised a little routine, I would let them examine her without me in the room. My presence made her more protective of me, and anxious about them touching her. Then I could come in and we’d talk about her with her calmly at my feet.

Dr. D never made me feel bad for any of that. When Dot became very sick with congestive heart disease, it was this kind man who gave us the time, the space, and the gentle words as we said goodbye to our family member. I will never forget his presence in that room and how he helped us through that difficult day. It took me many months before I could even return to their office for a visit with Kitty, just too painful.

Last week, a new chapter began as my son and I brought in our nine week old Aussiedoodle puppies to meet Dr.D. We received happy congratulations from the staff. The pups were not nervous at all, more quiet and curious. What I loved most about our visit is that this favorite doctor of mine was happy for our family, and did not say any kind of judgmental statement. “Two puppies? That’s nuts!” Nope, Dr.D was thrilled for us, examined them, gave some advice, answered my questions, and wished us congratulations! We will be visiting that office quite a bit over the next few months and years. I am confident we are in good hands. That’s all a mother really needs, right? Confidence.

NAME:   Koda

GENDER: Male

WEIGHT AT 9 WEEKS: 10 lbs 8 oz

DATE & PLACE OF BIRTH: April 22, 2018 in Floyd, Virginia

MOTHER: Australian Shepherd

FATHER: Standard Poodle

BREED: Aussiedoodle

NAME:   Summer

GENDER: Female

WEIGHT AT 9 WEEKS: 11 lbs 2 oz

DATE & PLACE OF BIRTH: April 22, 2018 in Floyd, Virginia

MOTHER: Australian Shepherd

FATHER: Standard Poodle

BREED: Aussiedoodle

The information listed above includes the simple facts. What it does not describe is what is so special about these two, what makes them different from one another, and how they affect one’s senses. Their smell, their touch and their mannerisms are the essential components to acquainting them to you. Let me try my best to bring you into this space.

I take Koda into my arms, and nuzzle my face into the depths of his downy soft coat.  It’s as if he knows the power of his fleecy fur and the contentment it evokes inside of me. He does not wriggle around or resist. He lets me take in the cushy coiled curls. Then after a moment of bliss, he seals it with a warm puppy kiss on my chin. He has tiny sharp white teeth but saves the gnawing for play and investigation. It’s just wet hot breathy kisses for now.

Summer’s coat is not quite as curly but is very smooth. It makes me think of coming out of a hair salon with my natural curls blown out straight. For a few hours my slick mane is soft to the touch with a few waves. Until the humidity begins to set the spirals in motion. Summer is like that time period before humidity wreaks havoc and produces frizz. Where Koda is all about the crimped curly poodle look. Summer gives sweet wet kisses on the chin just like Koda.

They have totally different face and body shapes. Summer is petite, as the vet called her. Koda is broad faced. Both have square floppy ears that are super soft between my fingers. Summer’s taller than her brother and weighs more, but Koda appears larger. He is round and looks plump. However most of that thickness is actually fluffy fur. They are black everywhere except for a small spot on their chests and their chinny-chin-chins.

What intrigues me about the Aussiedoodle is their human like eyes. At this age it is hard to tell what they will look like when full grown. What I do see is that the eyes are black with a white border. So when Summer is chewing on a rope toy and looks up at me with only her eyes and not lifting her head, the whites off her eyes are revealed. I do not remember this with other pets, definitely different than Kitty’s green cat eyes!

They both have long tails that flip back and forth as they play or await a treat. The tails bend high in the air. I am loving this as our Aussie’s tail was docked so when she wagged her tail she actually wagged her butt.

I am still discovering their personalities. Here are some verbs to describe them: bounding, pouncing, racing, jumping, rolling, sprawling, stretching, creeping, hiding, running, wrestling, barking, digging, licking, retrieving, pulling, peeing, pooping, sleeping, kissing, playing, investigating, sniffing, snuggling, drinking, eating, hiccuping, yawning, chewing, sitting, watching, learning, and resting their heads on each other.

You get the picture. Big sigh. If that list made you tired, then I have been successful at bringing you into my world. I hope you felt a warmness in your heart when reading about holding them in my arms.

Writing for this blog is my way of sharing this journey. It would not be complete without disclosing the events of a day like yesterday. I had my first time out of the house for several hours, leaving the puppies in the care of my eighteen year old son. I got a taste of my L.B.T.A.P. (Life Before Two Aussiedoodle Puppies).

After their morning routine, getting them settled in the six-sided octagon, and leaving lengthy instructions, I dashed out the door like a free woman! I drove into the city with my car windows open, hair flying wildly and the music playing loudy (Actually it was hot, the air conditioning was on, my hair in a ponytail and had the doctor channel on Sirius radio, but I felt like the previous image).

I was heading to my fiction writing class that I take at the VMFA studio building. A year ago I began taking classes (memoir and non-fiction creative writing). The three hour class goes by very fast. We write, we listen, and we discuss. I love it! Ten people from different walks of life gather together. It can be very personal in the memoir class as writers share vivid reflections. The fiction writing class I am in now is different. We focus on the creation of characters, scenes, dialog, etc. What fascinates me most is how one prompt can elicit ten entirely different storylines. “A man sits in a cafe with an infant…” We are given thirty minutes to take that somewhere.

I wrote about a sweet scene of a brand new father tiredly but lovingly holding his young baby while his wife ate her lunch. Then they switched and he ate while she held the cooing infant. The feedback I received was that my depiction of this scene was all rosy and perfect. Was it realistic? What about some bickering resentment between the new exhausted parents, or how about the baby spitting up on the fathers clean shirt? The fact is that real life is full of good and bad. Sweet smiling babies can also have colicky screaming moments. I tend to look through a lens that focuses in on the positive details, especially when writing about my family, my children, animals, and nature.

So if good writing needs to include some “reality,” here is my reality from yesterday. I fell into a bit of “hey-my-life-has-not-changed-too-much” frame of mind after my three hour release from the house. That relaxed feeling led to me getting a little off schedule with the puppies. Thus began a sequence of our first few potty accidents inside the house. Koda squatted right in front of me on the rug, just peed right there as we were playing with chew toys. “Eh, Eh, Eh,” I called out as I whisked him out the door to finish. Then a few hours later they were happily chilling in the octagon with their peanut butter filled kongs. A glass of Sauvignon blanc in my hand, catching up wth my friends Bethany and LuAnne in New York and all of a sudden, pee yoo! They both had pooped in the octagon! It was a mad dash by my daughter and I to scoop up the pups, and clean up the putrid puppy poop piles!

Now is that real enough for everyone?

Note: My blog writing takes place during their frequent napping, in case anyone is wondering.